Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In
The Founder of Inspire Leadership & focuses on unlocking people’s potential by providing them with programs; mentorship and coaching into high performance
By:- Roger Fisher, William L. Ury, Bruce Patton
Getting to Yes - Negotiating an agreement without giving in is a book covering how we can be effective in a non-confrontational negotiation. In most cases, we believe that negotiations need to be confrontational and the best option for one in any negotiation is to take a position and budge as little from it as possible. This unfortunately is misguided and it is what the book is trying to help us to avoid. The foremost principle of "Getting to Yes" is to base negotiations not on position but on interests. Even something as simple as deciding the amount of rent an apartment is worth involves interests that can help negotiations if mentioned. The landlord hopes the prospective tenant is quiet while the tenant hopes that the landlord will maintain the premises. Each party's total interests should weigh in the balance when negotiating the lease.
This book helps in understating the counterparty to the negotiating process as well as helping us to clarify our interests. There is need for us to understand our counterparty's interests and put ourselves in their place. The idea is not to sympathize with the other party and be more open to giving in, but rather to be able to make more effective offers.
What I like most from the book is that it provides some phrases that we will need to help us to avoid or defuse tense situations. The authors recommend that it is important to practice them in front of a mirror before the negotiations. If you are planning to negotiate with your landlord, negotiate for a salary increment, business deal etc, make sure you are proficient with the following phrases and how to use them:
- Please correct me if I'm wrong but...
- Could I ask you a few questions to see if my facts are right?
- Let me see if I understand what you are saying...
- I appreciate what you've done for us...
- My concern is fairness…
- Trust is a separate issue. (When asked "Don't you trust us?")
- What is the principle behind your action/decision?
- We'd like to settle this on the basis of independent standards.
Clearly practicing the negotiation beforehand will be a key ingredient to getting to yes without giving in.
Other key suggestions and what forms the principles of negotiations from the book includes the advice not to;
- Bargain over positions
- To separate the people from the problem
- To insist on an objective criterion
- And what considerations are there if there is no deal
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